A very successful woman I know recently said, “You CAN have it all, but not at the same time.”
Over the last week, one question has been repeated over and over. Everywhere I look and everywhere I turn people are asking the question, “Can women really have it all?” My inbox is flooded with emails on this topic as I type.
A couple of things come to mind. First, what does having it all mean? That’s different for every woman, I would think. Does it mean having a dream career, a tight marriage and being a supermom? Does it mean being able to stay at home and be the primary caretaker of your family? Does it mean having a successful career and traveling the world while being single and child free? Any of these could be the definition having it all for anyone.
My other issue with this question is why? Why is no one ever asking if men can have it all? What would it look like for a man to have it all? Why is no one concerned with that? There are no articles being written about whether or not a man can have it all, no debates about the topic. Then again, there are a lot of things we don’t talk about when it comes to men.
When we had our son, I don’t recall anyone asking if my husband was going to leave his career and stay at home. I’m pretty sure no one even thought to pose that question to him. For me, it was just an assumption. Everyone just knew I would stop working after having my son. I certainly wanted to but for various reasons, I didn’t. I digress, that’s a whole different post.
What do you think about this ongoing debate?